Hi again. You may wonder where I’ve been after my big “I’m back” announcement earlier this year. Or, if you’re a mom, you may have guessed that motherhood got the best of me — you’d be right.
Being a mom is honestly the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I’ve always been good at the things I set out to accomplish. I do a rockstar job everyday when I go to work. I’ve worked really hard to make this blog what it is today, and almost 4 years from when I started it, it’s still going. I like feeling competent and motherhood is somewhere I have almost never felt competent. Despite all the prep I did before our son was born (and believe me, I prepped like I’ve never prepped before!), once we left the safety of the hospital, I felt like I was barely treading water for weeks…and even sometimes to this day.
Before I continue, I want to just say that I know this is not a mom blog. I don’t intend this to become a mom blog. As always, The Hungry Bookworm will continue to focus on food and books. (Yes, that may mean kids’ books and kid-friendly recipes in the future, but still food and books, I promise.) But I wanted to lay this all out there, just so you know I wasn’t slacking on the blog — I still really love doing it, and have absolutely missed devoting time to my passions these past several months — and also to shed some light on the realities of new motherhood.
It’s not all cuddles and smiles and cuteness. It is definitely that, but it’s also sleepless nights and crippling anxiety and having no idea what’s going on even though you’re trying your best. Sure, no one says having kids is easy, but sometimes they gloss over the truth when talking to first time moms. I wasn’t hidden from the nitty-gritty of everyday parenting, but what was in store for me was nothing I was prepared for. As hard as this is to write, I wanted to share what I’ve been through. If it helps someone, it’s worth it. And then, we’ll be back to our regularly scheduled books-and-food programming (in about a month or so…)
Settle in, this is kind of long.